Sea girl Part 1

She looked like she belonged to it. 

The sea. 

Water crashed and broke all around her. 

And I had never seen someone so at peace. 

She walked as far as she wanted into the waves and was not swept away. 

Without realizing it, I’d crept closer and closer to the shore. 

I didn’t know if it was for her safety, or if it was because part of me wanted to follow her in. 

To be consumed by it all.

I heard a voice call out and say “follow me”…

But it came from farther out…

Deeper, above the sea.

When I looked past the girl. I saw a bright light dancing on the waves. 

Beckoning her to join the dance.

 The light spoke again.

What it said I do not know.

But the voice rolled like thunder and seemed to fire like lightning.

And instead of answering the voice… she turned to me.

I was surprised to find all along, she’d been me.

I had been too scared, and kept my body tethered to the shore.

But not anymore.

My spirit says yes to Him.

I’d love to follow the One that calls my spirit to dances along the waves. 

I’d love to find out who he really is. 

“God made two great lights, the greater light to rule over the day and the lesser light to rule over the night, as well as the stars. God placed them in the expanse of the sky to provide light on earth, to rule the day and night, and to separate light from darkness. And God saw it was good.”

-Genesis 1:16-18

Lord, my God…Creator of all. When will I stop resonating with the night. You created light to separate it from darkness and called it good. There was no blessing in the darkness. Yet, I find myself lying awake at night, looking to the lesser light. Looking to the stars that come alive in this darkness. Maybe it is like recognizing like. I often feel like I am hiding all the things that feel dark about me.

But how gracious are you, to illuminate the void within me…just how you gave the moon to the night. Not only did you give us the moon, but you adorned it with even smaller lights, named stars. Perhaps the lesser light is a reminder that the sun will rise the next day.

Darkness is not hopeless, because of your light. It will always rule supreme. Not only in the earth and sky, but in our lives. Even so, while I do not worship the moon, stars, or the sun..I am grateful for the beauty that lies in the stillness of night for I know that you are with me. And so darkness truly not truly dark, it shines like light because of you.

Throughout scripture, the Bible tells us not to be fearful. To pray and submit to God. But what happens when you do that, and you still feel like you can’t breathe or sleep at night…when anxiety and panic creep up your throat and strangles you?

Fear is hard to deal with because if you let it in for too long, it can leave you feeling  debilitated, and unable to move forward into the promises of God. I’ve been experiencing fear on a whole other level lately… you’d think I’d be floating on top of the world right now considering I just got into Physical Therapy School. I initially was very happy about being admitted into PT school, but I let words of other people throw me off. Fear and confusion struck one day when pastorship was suggested to me. Although I’ve always known that I was called to ministry, I had never desired to pastor. So, those words sent me spiraling. I lost all my happiness out of fear of the unknown. Fear because it’s not what I wanted. Fear because I couldn’t discern the validity of the call. Fear because if it was true, how would that change my life?

I spent a lot of time praying and asking God what he wanted me to do. Praying for signs that physical therapy was still the right path for me. Time after time I felt like I was getting confirmation that I was on the right path but I still felt a swelling in me. Some of it was panic and some of it felt like God was calling me. Due to all this stress, I had a pretty bad panic attack not too long ago. One of my best friends had to sit on FaceTime with me all night but I still didn’t feel good. The next day, I decided to open up to my dad about everything. He helped me realize that ministry is just in my blood. Loving people and ministering to people is what I am called to do. But that doesn’t mean that I have to do it in a pulpit. It doesn’t mean that I have to drop physical therapy and give up the opportunity of being in rooms with people I would otherwise never get the chance too. God can use every aspect of our lives for his glory.

Pastor Michael Todd has been delivering an amazing series called “Who’s The Minister Here?” and I highly suggest everyone watch it. He truly brings home the point that first of all, we are ALL the ministers. God has placed special gifts and talents inside us all to share his good news to the lost. As devoted Christians, we get the privilege to be the person who steps in any situation and properly represent our God. 

We are living in a time where things in the world will get worse and not better. However, the church is rising and growing stronger. We will do greater things in Jesus’s name. We will be doctors, lawyers, nurses, actors, authors and in the same breath we will be healers, prophets, prayer warriors, and preach the good news to lost souls. The time we are living in calls us to fight. I feel the hunger. I feel the pressure from God that this is not a drill. And it is not an easy burden to carry. But I know I’m not alone. I’m positive that there are plenty of people feeling God moving. And I know that he is not finished with me or any of you. We will bring the Kingdom of God to earth. We will tell our stories. We will win souls. We will sit at the feet of God and bask in his love. And when we accept his invitation and let him love us, so perfectly as he does, he will restore all that we have lost and MORE. 

Peace and Blessings from your favorite Future Doctor and Minister😉

Experiencing  loss will make you ask questions that are morbid. Questions that no one really wants to ask themselves. Maybe, because if we were to ask ourselves these questions, our own answers would disappoint us.

This September, my Grandfather on my mothers side unexpectedly died. And not a single person saw it coming. It didn’t matter that he was in his 70s, we knew him to be still relatively healthy. While our hearts are still grieving, we’re happy he’s home with Jesus now. To be home with Jesus is what we all should be planning for one day. But I feel like sometimes we lose sight of that.

So, I guess my question to you guys is, if God were to crack the sky today, not even tomorrow, where would you be spending eternity? Or, if God decided it was your time to die (because we all have to go at some point) what would you be telling God about your life here on earth? If you can’t for certain say that you’d be going to heaven, or even if you think you’d for certain be going to hell, please seek God while he’s still here to be found. Life keeps teaching me over and over again that we are not invincible. No one is exempt from the snares and trials of this life. Anyone one of us could end up dead at any moment. Yes, I said what I said. We live in a world where we rarely think of our mortality. Rarely stopping to think of the consequences of our actions. Please, let it be known, that my purpose in writing this is not to offend or hurt anyone’s feelings. I am concerned about the state of everyone’s soul. So if you believe you are good, then keep seeking God and doing his will. But I’d truly like to urge my friends and peers that are still young (or older) to get a good look at how you are living your life. And this is not from a judgmental standpoint, but from moment of what would you do if it was over NOW? I’m constantly hearing the words “I’m still young, so I’m waiting to completely give my life to God!” or, “I’ll get right when I’m older, I want to have fun now.” or my favorite, “You can’t judge me, only God can judge me!”.  First of all, like I’ve already stated, being young does not mean your life isn’t in jeopardy. The Devil hates our GUTS. He’d love nothing more than to take you out while you have no relationship with Jesus.  We are out here living like there aren’t demonic forces around every corner, lurking in the shadows for us.

 

1 Peter 5:8-11 (MSG) says “Keep a cool head. Stay alert. The Devil is poised to pounce, and would love nothing better than to catch you napping. Keep your guard up. You’re not the only ones plunged in hard times. It’s the same with Christians all over the world. So keep a firm grip on the faith. It won’t be long before this generous God who has great plans for us in Christ–eternal and glorious plans they are!–will have you put together and on your feet for good. He gets the last word; yes, he does.”

The Lord is gracious. He is ready and willing to save us and then forgive us as many times as needed. However, we should never abuse this grace. We should stop taking him for granted when he’s been waiting for us with open arms. I want each and every person that reads this to understand that God owes us NOTHING. Not a thing. But, we owe him everything. This week, lets reflect on where we are in life. Let’s take a honest evaluation and see what we’ve been doing with the gifts and this life God has blessed us with.

Romans 14:10-12 (MSG) reads, “Eventually, we’re all going to end up kneeling side by side in the place of judgment, facing God. Your critical and condescending ways aren’t going to improve your position there on bit. Read it for yourself in Scripture:

‘As I live and breathe,‘ God says, ‘every knee will bow before me; Every tongue will tell the honest truth that I and only I am God.“

 

We will all have to give an account for our life here on earth. Not that God needs it because he knows everything we have done and will do. BUT, there is freedom because of his Grace. His Grace washes all those sins away because Jesus paid the price for us already. However, we have to choose Him. In healthy, loving relationships, we all have to choice to be in them. God always will give us a choice. My prayer for all of us comes straight out of Ephesians 3:14-21(NLT)…

“When I think of all this, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father,  the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth. I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. Glory to him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! Amen.”

Peace and Blessings,

Nia.

 

I’ll live my life trying to make my own footsteps towards heaven, right next to yours granddad.

 

Worship. How many of us know what it really means? How many of us unknowingly worship the things of this world more than we worship God? Choosing to spend hours a day doing anything else rather than spending time in God’s presence. I’m guilty of this. It was hard to start this post because if I’m being honest, all I wanted to do was go watch one of my newest TV shows. Then I was convicted deeply by the Holy Spirit. How can I write about a lifestyle of worshiping God, when I constantly choose other things over him. This isn’t to say that we can’t enjoy other things in life but we need to be mindful of what we allow ourselves to continually entertain. Joshua 1:8 (NLT)says, “Study this Book of Instruction continually. Meditate on it day and night so you will be sure to obey everything written in it. Only then will you prosper and succeed in all you do.”

Day AND Night? Yeah, still working on that. I’m feel like I’m doing good if I can study my devotionals each morning haha. However, I do under the importance of this practice because it is a part of worshipping God in TRUTH. Worship is a way of life. Singing, reading the word, serving someone other than yourself, having an attitude of gratitude, going to that job you can’t stand with a positive spirit because you never know who needs to see the light in you. These are examples of worship toward God. Basically, living life doing everything into the Lord. Here is a passage out of Psalms 34…

“Come, children, listen closely; I’ll give you a lesson in GOD worship.

Who out there has a lust for life? Can’t wait each day to come upon beauty?

Guard your tongue from profanity, and no more lying through your teeth.

Turn your back on sin; do something good. Embrace peace—don’t let it get away!

GOD keeps an eye on his friends, his ears pick up every moan and groan.

GOD won’t put up with rebels; he’ll cull them from the pack.

Is anyone crying for help? GOD is listening, ready to rescue you.

If your heart is broken, you’ll find GOD right there; if you’re kicked in the gut, he’ll help you catch your breath.

Disciples so often get into trouble; still, GOD is there every time.

He’s your bodyguard, shielding every bone; not even a finger gets broken.

The wicked commit slow suicide; they waste their lives hating the good.

GOD pays for each slave’s freedom; no one who runs to him loses out.”

-Psalm 34:11-22 (MSG)

We believe we worship God but I think we miss the mark very often. If we were to look at our daily activities and the things/people we promote on our social media I think we’d get a better look at what we really worship. Like the passage above says, we lust after the world and the beauty it has to offer. Running to things that lead down a path of destruction. We spend our time engaged in profane and meaningless conversations. We try to fill our emptiness with things that don’t last and cry out to God to fix it when the solution is to turn from the world and fill ourselves with God. When we constantly choose the world over God we slowly choose our own demise.

If I’m being transparent I struggle with worshipping God on a consistent basis when I’m having a hard time. As you all know, life hits hard. For me, life has hit in a lot of ways this year. I’ve been without a job since I graduated in December, struggled with a pretty serious issue of anemia which required immediate iron infusions, and I got bills coming from every angle. I could on as I’m sure a lot of you could too. My intent is not to get you to feel bad for me but to be transparent about my life and to get you to understand we have a few options when the storms roll in. We can fold into our selves, and blame the world, get mad and lash out on everyone. I did that for a minute. Sometimes I revert back to this on bad days. I had to realize that no matter what was going on, I couldn’t get scared and shut down. I had to fight for my praise and glorify God because that’s all I can do besides obey him. God allowed me to see that this isn’t my destination, just a part of the trip. Let’s learn to dance when it thunders. Let’s stop letting our storms frighten us because SOMETIMES they sound and look much worse than they actually are. Not to mention, God is bigger than it all. He has ALL power. We can praise God with all that we have, and believe me, he sees it. All the the devil wants to do is steal our worship. Don’t let him. Worship is a weapon. Our worship and reverence of God is what frees us from the pain of this life. When God shuts a door, but takes a while to open the next one, let’s live as best we can in that hallway season. How do we live in the hallway season? We submit to his will (even when its difficult), serve one another, use our talents for the kingdom, and spread the good, simple news. The last thing I want to leave you with is a passage from Romans 12, it sums up all that I’ve said.

“So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life– your sleeping, eating, going to work, and walking-around life– and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out.”

Romans 12:1-2 (MSG)

Peace and Blessings

Heyyy y’all ! All the scriptures in this post will be in the Message Version, just to make everything crystal clear. So let’s start with the Word.

Luke 14:25-34

25-27 One day when large groups of people were walking along with him, Jesus turned and told them, “Anyone who comes to me but refuses to let go of father, mother, spouse, children, brothers, sisters—yes, even one’s own self!—can’t be my disciple. Anyone who won’t shoulder his own cross and follow behind me can’t be my disciple.

28-30 “Is there anyone here who, planning to build a new house, doesn’t first sit down and figure the cost so you’ll know if you can complete it? If you only get the foundation laid and then run out of money, you’re going to look pretty foolish. Everyone passing by will poke fun at you: ‘He started something he couldn’t finish.’

31-32 “Or can you imagine a king going into battle against another king without first deciding whether it is possible with his ten thousand troops to face the twenty thousand troops of the other? And if he decides he can’t, won’t he send an emissary and work out a truce?

33 “Simply put, if you’re not willing to take what is dearest to you, whether plans or people, and kiss it good-bye, you can’t be my disciple.

34 “Salt is excellent. But if the salt goes flat, it’s useless, good for nothing.

“Are you listening to this? Really listening?”

Well, this passage kinda hurts doesn’t it? Here, Jesus is telling us there actually is a cost to being his disciple. And maybe, you’re thinking, “well what’s the truth? Because my whole life I’ve been told that Jesus has paid it all, so why is there a price to follow him?” It seems like a contradiction of what we’ve been taught…(you know there’s a “but” coming right?)

BUT, it’s not. See, there is a difference in this story that you might not catch if you read to fast. Jesus is talking about being his disciple, being a part of his inner circle. His salvation and grace are free. You can know God, accept him as your father and receive his gift of salvation. That alone is such an amazing gift, to be apart of his kingdom. Yet, some people think that’s all that there is to be done, not knowing or understanding that you can go so much further than that. Now, the thing is, Jesus wants all of us to be a part of his inner circle. He desires for all of us to reach maturity in our relationship with him, where we choose to take up our cross and risk persecution and all that comes with being right there in the mud with him. However, sometimes we decide to stay in the crowd. We believe we are better off keeping up with him from a distance, because the truth is, the closer you get to Jesus, the more you feel the cost.

I’ve felt it. I still feel it sometimes. Letting go of the way the world does things can be hard. Because not all of it is bad or necessarily a sin, yet God tells us not to conform to the world. So I try to be careful about what I do, how I speak to others and my behavior. Changing the very nature of your flesh can be difficult and take time. And it’s not always fun at first. Sometimes it seems pointless because it seems like your life was better before you tried giving up your old ways and adopting Gods way. Death to the old you is so crucial though because it allows God to bring everlasting life to the new you. And yes, you will feel the growing pains of becoming a new version of yourself but you stand to gain everything God has to offer. Our lives before God are flimsy, nothing is ever truly satisfying for long. Living a new life with God, we stand to gain everything. Romans 8:12-14 (MSG) puts it like this, “So don’t you see that we don’t owe this old do-it-yourself life one red cent. There’s nothing in it for us, nothing at all. The best thing to do is give it a decent burial and get on with your new life. God’s Spirit beckons. There are things to do and places to go!”

Look y’all, we have stuff to do and places to go! People need God now more than ever. This world is suffering and we can offer them Love and truth. But in order to do so, we have to carry our crosses. We have to be “Salty”, in the words of Jesus lol. The reason I wanted to talk about the cost of being a follower of God is because I know it holds a lot of us back from our callings, handling business and just living the lives we were destined to live. Some of you may be leery to embark on the journey of getting close to God. And some of you may be in it, sacrificing things or people but not feeling like you are getting anywhere. Please do not get discouraged. Remember God is in the business of planting seeds! Seeds take time to grow before there is a harvest. And because of the plans and great things He has for us, life might not get easy or better overnight. Hold tight to His word and trust in His promise.

If you get tired along the way just ask him to restore your strength. In Jeremiah 31:25 the Lord says, “I’ll refresh tired bodies; I’ll restore tired souls.”

Take a chance on God and step into the inner circle. While there may be a cost, the final product is priceless.

Peace and Blessings💛

Today I’m taking a moment to be transparent about where I’m at in life and to hopefully encourage anyone who may also be in a similar situation. I hope it resonates with at least one of person.

Soooooo, I feel like I’m in a line. A really long line, where I have ticket 103 and they are on they’ve just called ticket 10. So, here I am…waiting. I’m confident in the fact that I’m not the only person in this world who isn’t fond of waiting. In so many ways, this season of post-grad life has been beautiful. I have to often remind myself of the beauty because other wise that ungratefulness creeps in. I’ve grown so much spiritually and I desire more of God everyday. I’ve been working on my physical and mental health. Each day I’m making moves toward my career goal to be a Physical Therapist. And lastly, my favorite thing about being home is spending time with my family. Even with all these great things going, there are some days where I’m not so patient or willing to look on the bright side.

Maybe like me, you find yourself in a similar season of expecting things from God but not knowing when he’s going to come through. And maybe you are handling it awesome. Or, like me, you’ve been a bit emotional and have days where you just feel rocky. Like one thing can cause a bad mood shift. I usually just ugly cry haha. It’s not a great feeling. There’s an old gospel song that both comforts me and makes me laugh. It says “Late in the midnight hour, Gods going to turn it around, and it’s going to work in your favor!”

While on one hand, I’m so grateful to have a father that always comes through, I low key wonder to myself “Dang God, why is it LATE in the MIDNIGHT hour???”

It’s so ingrained in our society to think of the negatives instead of the positive. The only thing we should be concerned with is the fact that God WILL come through. And it doesn’t matter that it’s the last minute because he still comes through. That’s the point. He gets the victory and glory because who else could turn a situation that seems irreversible or dead into something that you want to run and tell everyone about. God does his best work when the things seem hopeless because those are the testimonies that bring souls into his kingdom. So even though I still might cry, while I wait, I read my Bible. And I talk to people that have been through some valleys and I marvel at how God miraculously used every seemingly negative thing into something good. While I wait, I praise my God anyway because I know that he cares about me. I know he sees me. And he knows what I need before I open my mouth. While I wait, I take the time to see the beauty in this pain and how God is going to set it up for his glory. Because half the stuff we go through isn’t even for us. It’s for the souls that we will attract because of what we did in hard times and how we came out.

So I want to just encourage everyone to really contemplate on how you may be waiting. If your wait isn’t giving glory to God, you might want to figure out how to turn it around. God wants to see that even though you don’t have it in your hands now, you have the promise in your heart. He wants to know you trust him implicitly. I’ll be praying for both you and me, while we wait.

“But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.”

‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭40:31‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Peace and Blessings💛

Who among us does not desire radical and life changing miracles?

How many times have we prayed for God to open the heavens and pour out his blessings like a torrential rain. Okay, well maybe those weren’t the exact words that you may have prayed but you get my point. At some point, I feel like most of us have asked for God to just show out. And here’s the thing, God wants too. He is a good father who wants to give his children good gifts. But, bear with me… sometimes I think God wants us to do a little more. I’m beginning to think that for crazy and radical miracles, He wants foolish and radical faith.

 

I am not saying that you have to work or earn his love and grace. Those are free gifts. However, I am starting to think you can definitely earn and receive extreme favor from God. The Cambridge Dictionary defines favor as “approval or support of someone or something”. Then, Hebrews 11:6 says this, ” But without faith it is impossible to please him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He rewards those who diligently seek Him.” God rewards those who earnestly seek him. Yet, first you must have faith. Faith is the biggest fight most Christians face. I believe that most of us go through life saying we believe, but we really don’t. Myself, included.

 

The past few months have been challenging. I try not to complain because I know I am beyond blessed and life could be much worse. God has been here with me in each step. Even though I know He’s here, I forget sometimes. I feel like I’m lost or stuck somewhere on an island with no way to get to my destination. It’s in these shipwrecked moments I think of the story of Job and the tremendous faith he had in God.

Job was a man who loved God. Not just with his words but with everything he had. Job 1:1 calls him “blameless and upright, and one who feared God and turned away from evil.” And because of his extreme reverence, God matched his energy and blessed him so much that the bible says he was the greatest man of the east during his time. Everyone noticed Job, including the devil. He saw Job’s adoration of his heavenly father. So one day the devil visited heaven and asked God to test Job. Satan just knew that if he could take away everything Job had, Job would curse God’s name. So, God allowed (see only God has true authority) Satan to take everything Job had as long as he did not harm Job.

Job lost everything. Servants, livestock, wealth, and his children. When the last messenger came, telling the demise of his children, Job did a really strange thing. He got up, tore his robe, shaved his head, and then dropped to the ground and worshiped God. Here’s what poured from his heart…

 

“Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I will depart.

The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away;

May the name of the Lord be praised.”

Job 1:20-22

 

This guy was different. When I read this scripture for the first time, I’m pretty sure I scoffed and thought he was crazy. I still think this was crazy actually, but Job understood something we don’t. The craziest thing about this story is that it doesn’t end here. Satan goes back to heaven and petitions to test Job AGAIN. He thought  Job didn’t curse God  because he wanted to keep his life and a man will do and say anything to keep his life. Satan just knew that if he caused illness to fall upon Job, that he would finally curse God. But the gag was, Job never curses God. Oh sure, he cursed himself, he cursed the day he was born, he curses just about everything but God. At one point in the story, Jobs wife asks him why doesn’t he just turn his back on God. She says “Curse God and die!” (Job 2:9)

So many of us have turned our back on God through lesser trials. We question God over the smallest things. It must make God so sad, because all he wants to do is love and bless us. But he needs to know we won’t squander what he gives us. He needs to know his treasures and seeds will be put to good use. How can God trust us will million dollar dreams when we have $5 faith?

Job’s story ends well you know. He suffers through all those trials and extreme tragedies and earns favor in the sight of his Father. God blesses him with twice more than what he had before. He even had more children and lived to be 140 years old.

 

I wonder what ridiculous things God would do in our lives if we just held still. If instead of walking away from him and accepting defeat, we would fall down and worship him. Yes, Satan may tempt us. Yes, he’s out to kill and steal. But Satan has a leash. He can only go as far as God allows. I dare you to have foolish faith like Job. Believe that God is the great I AM. Whatever miracle you are waiting for, keep holding on. Don’t give up. Know that God never leaves you. When the devil tries you, go crazy in your worship of God and see if he doesn’t bless your faith.

 

Peace and Blessings friends.